I think Im ready now....

Okay, my dad just passed away few weeks ago. And my life is going nowhere from that moment..

Macam, the day before he left, ya punya bday.. and then, the next day, tau tau ya nada lagi.. Ironic? I know.. Eventhough I never had a chance to know him better, hes still my dad. To be called anak yatim, um, im not ready for that. probably sampai bila bila pun aku kan inda ready. he's just gone for now.. but ia tah babah dunia akhirat ku.. even now, i still menangis bila tekanangkan babah.. And yes, I DO MISS HIM.. :'(

The damn thing about it is that orang buat fitnah.. atu laa, ani laa. Banar, caranya end everything tu inda smart but takdir sudah cematu. So, FUCK YOU ALL YANG AIBKAN BABAH.. ESPECIALLY THIS ORANG TUA.. Mati tah kau sama harta mu and kepercayaan mu yang shirik aa.. I dont care kau siapa.. Makin awal kau inda benafas, makin bahagia idup kami.. Because of you, idup kami sial.. but remember, kalau masa ani pun kau kan mengacau kami, i'll make your life much more sial dari kami punya life. not just yours, but keturunan mu.. bukannya aku na tau family tree mu..

Babah buat cemani supaya kau inda mengacau kami lagi, but you insisted kan balas dendam sedangkan atu bukan salah babah. kalau kau inda pikir pakai kepala ***** mu, inda kami kan cemani.. ani, kau blame kami and not to mention, anak anak mu yang tau atu salah mu pun memajal kan salahkan babah. my theory, durang defend kau supaya salahnya arah babah saja. banar, inda semua orang tau yang atu salah mu jua. but family ku, family mu and tuhan tau.. inda payah pura pura innocent macam babi kan kana salai. kau becakap pasal hukum agama, tapi kau pecaya arah barang shirik.. camana kan tu? in my whole life, inda ku pernah tejumpa aji yang bloody stupid macam kau..!! even masa babah alum bekubur pun kau kan beulah.. puas ati mu ya nada?? urang tua SIAL..!! mengaga tah kau kerumah, kalau kau buat kacau, I'll make sure kau dapat apa yang kau deserve and im tellin you, it wont be money..!! kau ugut mami ku kan buat ani laa, atu laa.. tapi satu pun nada kau buat.. cakap bukan main macam apa. tapi buat, nada..!! and kalau kau buat pun, kau pun terima tempiasnya tu.. caya tah..

kau cakap kau kesian kan kami.. please, kami seumur idup pun inda pernah minta simpati dari urang gila harta macam kau.. kalau banar pun kau kesiankan kami, inda kau kan betindak macam urang palui wa..

i just wanna make things right.. tapi kau masih kan buat cara mu as if ani a game.. well let me tell you, if this is a game game, i'll make sure im in the lead. inda ku kan biar mamiku terima semua beban. macam, i really dont get it.. kau tua sudah, but masih pikiran macam kanak kanak.. ohh wait, salah.. pikiran macam antah apa.. sedangkan kanak kanak lagi tau bezakan mana lurus mana salah. ani kan kau yang umur setangah abad.. rasa guilty sikit pun nada wa arah kau aa. pasal kau aku and peradian ku ilang babah. pasal kau, mami ku ilang suami.. inda ku tau ati mu ni ati apa.. and kau mention, pasal kalau ati mu kapir, babah lama sudah nada.. so youre saying atimu ati slam?? HAHAHA..!! inda payah tah kan bawa bawa islam kalau tau kau salah. bari malu diri saja. Hipokrit and ego.. yatah ulah mu....

of all orang yang mengaib kan babah, kau yang paling ku gigitan wa. eeeeee, macam ringan rasa tangan sama kaki ku everytime pikir pasal dosa mu arah babah..

okay okay, nanti lagi menyialkan ia.. ani, pasal orang di fb.. namanya Danysh shii budak noty kali kalau ku inda salah.. ani another anak inda kana didik ni.. ia mengucap babah macam, hahh, gila kali, kurang ajar banar la.. ya cakap babah buat catu supaya kana puji.. inda buduh dari mana tu?? kalau ya minta puji, idup wa babah masih time ani.. kau kali capi capi kan cakap cematu supaya kana puji.. ehh wang, mun rasanya kau atu cool, jumpa kami, cakap dapan dapan, inda payah dari fb macam urang kulup..! kau pun nanti mati jua tu, inda tau cana caranya.. tapi youre not in a bloody position kan judge babah.. kau inda tau cerita sebenar, so diam saja. sumbat mulut tu kai ***** mu..

to orang fb yang pernah mengucap babah, FUCK YOU ASSWHORE..! kamu buat fitnah pasal utangnya.. menipu jua kalau kamu inda pernah beutang.. and ada yang mention 'urang bsp tah banar'.. dang, saudara mu ada kali aa kraja bsp.. inda payah tah luan kambang sampai cakap catu.. nada orang kan puji tu, banar.. inda payah tunjuk kancang dalam fb.. mun ganya statement atu keluar dari hasil mu pikir pakai fake boobs mu atu, jangan tah kan capi capi sana..

orang tua tuanya yang buat fitnah atu jua, start tah pikir lurus lurus.. jangan tah kan dangar buah mulut urang saja. kamu bukan ada sana darinya meninggal sampai kana kuburkan.. jadi, diam tah saja aa.. mun luan gian kan begossip, ucap tah among yourselves.. imagine tah mun kamu kana tinggal laki, sandinya inda dapat dibandingkan sama apa yang kami alami tu.. kamu tau cakap saja.. kamu bukan merasa apa yang kami rasa. lapas mengucap, puas tah ati kamu tu.. sampai punduk punduk jua kamu kan buat fintah macam urang palui.. baie wa cara kamu menyebarkan buah mulut aa..


-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



ani, i wanna say thanks for those yang actually care.. yang support aku and my family throughout the weeks..

ultimate DAMNation

You know, in my life, i never know what i want. But when i do know, i can never have it. And i ended up giving up all my dreams for something i thought would be worth every sacrifices i made. Ironic isn't it.. And imagine, i have to live like this for the rest of my perfect little life..

oh my...

This morning sucks.. In some way, it does. I cant seem to focus my mind in a single thing. All i can think of is um, nothing.. Man, i dont like starting my day with a wrong decision.. Im planning on applying a new license but, pegawai nya nadaaaaa... So, tegendala lagi. Ishh, everytime im here, (i meant EVERYTIME..!) selalu saja pegawainya not around.

Btw, im looking forward for tonight.. Nights-out with my baby. Yeaaa..! Its been sooo long, no, wait, wayyyy too long since i last had a lovely evening.. :)

And aku ngantuk, a nap would be perfect.. Too bad im in no position to sleep right now, ishh..

Ehh awu, baby, tani 1 year and six months arini.. :) :) :)

If I could turn back time.....

I would.... I really would, so I can fix that one and only tiny problem.. Its not my place to judge your personality. But i know that if I were you, I would've done the same thing.. So, seriously, forgive me?

8th October 2010

I would like to thank my baby for celebrating my birthday with me. Eventhough it was dawn masa atu. I never had a chance to tell you how much I appreciate you being there with me.

And thanks to those yang balikan cakes.. :)

Things happen for a reason

' "am i going to die?" i asked. "no, not just yet.." said the doctor.'

:)

Today is my birthday.. Im half happy and half emotionless..

Current date, 8th October, 2010..
Current time, 12:09 AM.
Curent location, home with my baby.

I feel alone since my baby is asleep. And i dont know what to tell you guys. I've run out of topics and ideas, badly..! 4 more days lagi genap 2 years since my late grandpa, Haji Suhaili Bin Pulong left us. He was a great man. Very supportive and very loving.

Grandpa, i miss you. Not that kami inda reda with what happened.. Its just that, things has been so different. For nearly 2 years, our heart feel so empty. I was frustrated until I met my baby. How I wish I can tell you all about him. He is a very awesome guy. He make me feel complete in a male female relationship. I've change because of him. A good thing though. Its hard living on my own. So I wish to marry him by next year of course.. And I made a promise to spent my wages in a good way so I can use my own money for my wedding. And I shall not break it. Life without you is like living in a house that had been cut into many pieces. I know death is inevietable, but pretending like you're here makes me feel alright. Everynight, I cry to my sleep thinking if anything would go wrong. Thinking if I would still be with my family tomorrow. I remember how you used to accompany me every morning waiting for the school bus. I never had a chance to say thank you.. So, Thank You grandpa. I thank you for taking care of us. For making things right when they're wrong.. Ohh man I cant seem to stop these tears from falling.. I keep your photo so I can look at you everyday. I keep your shirt so I can pretend like you're always be there when I need you.. But, I rarely enter your room coz it hurts too much remembering why I wasnt there at the very last moment.... Somehow, I regret for not seeing it coming. Losing you is the most painful thing that ever happened.. I hate going out from the house coz Im scared I might walk pass a person who looks just like you.. Uh, I hate goodbyes. Grandpa, we will always love you.. For us, you will always be in our heart and in our thoughts...

as time goes on..

so, i had a little fun at majlis sambutan hari raya last sunday at jabatan penerangan.. Went there with alai and went back home with my baby.. Thanks baby. And, i felt like im a loner there, surrounded by groups of strangers.. And i would be lying if i tell you that they were all very friendly.. Um, attending a function where many people will gather, sucks..! But, i won a hamper. Thanks to amin for receiving it on my behalf.. And thanks to alai and awang for accompany me as i had no transport.. But most of all, thanks baby for spending the rest of the evening with me. :)

photos - baby cousin

havent post a single photo for a while. so enjoy..! :)

I, um, have no idea....

As usual, my boring story and i.. im thinking about closing this account.. I,ve been staying in this 'cave' for almost um, 2 years, i guess... And there's this feeling, the feeling of i dont know.. i just feel like staying away from any social networking sites..

anyway, will update soon if im not lazy..

Well, this is life.....

I've read a book called ASH by Malinda Lo. It was a super duper amazing experience..! It's about magic and reality. Not probably your thing. But for me, it gave me this warm feelings when i read it. Okay, it might sounds as if im exaggerating..

Anyway, Im feeling old and lame since i havent been out of my home since forever.

I miss my baby the most.. aah, what a boring evening.. And its sunny. I prefer raining actually..

i am so back for a moment

Hi again.. And as you can see, Im back, but maybe just for this short period of time.. I feel like spilling something from this brain of mine. ohh kulut english ku ehh..

First, goodnight and sweetdreams baby.. LOVE YA..! :)

Second, thanks to mus, faiz and mubin for comin ari atu.. i had good times with you guys, mengumpat..!

Anyway, aku baru liat fb a bunch of kids dari fb my sis.. each of them has 'unique' style and way of living... And, nada kan ditekajutkan, durang ani kan becinta luan luan saja. and and ada lagi laki laki ani, crave ia punya wrist buat nama so-called girlfriend nya.. lame much?? mun kan tunjukkan diri atu kononnya sayang kan girlfrien atu, inda jua payah cematu.. capi capi tu baa namanya. trust me, EMO DOESN'T EXIST, KID..!

Last time, kami faiz cerita pasal couple show off gambar durang kissing ani bah.. Profile picture... Again, inda jua payah show off cematu.. even if you guys mau tunjuk yang kamu sweet, loving couple, gambar senyum sama sama pun bulih juaaaa.. inda kan? rasa jua kan tunjuk liar tu ohh? :) if you're that horny, get a room..! macam bitch wa tu cematu tu, am i right?? wait, im always right..

and ada lagi, someone yang ku selalu tejumpa, bukan kenal. gambar arah fbnya ani, gambarnya holding alcoholic drinks.. boo hoo. calaaaa..! everybody can do that, arsehole..! mau tunjuk diri berani minum barang cematu? no need laa. buat malu saja tuuu.. banar..!

extra note: i do have a life. dont think i dont have one just because aku highlight sikap kamu yang um macam antah apa ni.. And for those yang berkenaan, now you know how I feel masa kamu interupt my life.. masa kamu macam bitch kan kacau idup orang saja....

-THE END-

The next journey

Made Kad Buruh yesterday. yang tinggal, cari kraja saja lagi..

Edited a photo. Inspired by Hassansins from Prince of Persia. Eventhough inda sama. But I just got the idea dari movie atu. duhh, sekadar.

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY BABY

Yeah. the moment I've been waiting for.. thanks for the treat baby and for the necklace.. its pretty. thank you thank you thank you sooooo muchhhh...! I love you. and what i wrote on my book about the next anniversary, i mean it.. :)

just because

i feel umm, nothing. maybe the medicine has done its job. making me feel so damn sleepy that i hallucinate everytime im trying to fight the feeling off. unicorn, rainbow, edward cullen, you name it babe, they were in front of me a minute ago.. ohh wait, they're still here. ohh man, i need to sleep..

mmkayzZz zZz zZz krooh krooh krooh.. *drools*

dawn dudu

aah, another morning with insomnia and boredom.

okay, my mind is pretty empty right now. i dont know what to do other than sitting like someone mad listening to a song that has been repeated for more than gazzilion times.

well, i've watched iron man 2 with my baby. woo hoo..! siiiuk..! and, aku mau liat ip man 2 lagi. like, badly.. tapi inda tau bila, uh.. by the way, thanks for the lunch and movie baby.. :)

hoho, weekend SUCKS..! ohh wait, everyday is weekend for me. duhh.. cerita di astro pun buring. gosh.. i cant think of anything better to do. liat youtube, dangar lagu, update blog.. ohh by the way, i wanna change my blog's layout. i mean, just the color. but again, i dont know which color to put on. but absolutely NO yellow. bida..!

umm, apa lagi? ohh ohh. aku mau keyboard. and my pa said that i havent fininshed any guitar lesson yet but ada hati kan cuba instrument lain... i mean, i dont like to memorize chords. its like memorizing maths formulas. puuhhless. so not into it.. its just that lately ive been listening to soft songs. it inspires me to play piano. but, ive been thinking pulang.. piano inda banyak function. so, conclusionnya, keyboard is better.. but i dont think i will get one masani.

mm, i think thats it. mau try to sleep dulu kay?

i love twilight and im lame

i've just watched the twilight saga:new moon yesterday. i know, ketinggalan. aku miss liat arah movie aruatuuuuu. but anyway, i love twilight but not that desperate. i mean, how i wish my role and my life in this world would be as sweet as bella's and edwards's. hoho. the surrounding. the sorrow and magical place. hooyeah.. i do believe in fairy tales.

aku suka, aku suka, aku suka. some of you must be wondering how lame can i be... well guys, this is my life and this medicine is already taking control of my soul. aku mengantuk and i cant get over the fact that vampires dont exist.. nonsense..! bah, tidur dulu. taaaaa..

that's freaking rude, woman..!

okay, last tuesday i went to the hospital. bahagian emergency since atu patang sudah. and, aku batuk aaand selesma. so i kinda need ubat. i waited about 5 minutes sampai kana panggil kedalam and then bla bla bla. kana suruh tunggu arah tampat corner dakat bilik doctor aa. then, tunggu lagi.. batah like fuck..! padahal time atu aku and my niece saja yang kan becheck. decades lapastu barutah datang doctor binibini indian anii. and im not trying to be some kind of racist. so, sambung balik.. um,and now, barutah turn ku. so, aku bagitau laa yang i have a flu and batuk sama having difficulties breathing since idungku tesumbat. lapastu ya check check macam urang malas. then bagi list ubat. so aku tanya cemani 'um, ani include ubat supaya inda tesumbat idung ka ni?' then, macam urang buduh ya menjawab 'i already give you the syrup, thats enough!!' and i was like, 'shit, kasar betina ani menjawab!!' okay, so doctor, i dont have guts kan cakap in front of your face masa atu. probably because i wasnt felling very weel. and im sick enough meliat muka mu. aku takut muntah dapan kau saja. sooooo, i just want you to know that, it would be my pleasure to go to other hospital if kau malas macam baie sudah kan layan pesakit. mmkay? you couldve said that kau malas. just dont treat us, the commoners macam urang minta sedakah okay??!! im sick at a point where im about to go BOOM sudah.. so i dont need you to make it worst.. kay?

dulu pun pernah ku becheck and tekana kau. you were rude jua at that time. and dont think youre good enough to be part of the brunei people. segala kesusahan mu ya jua kana tanggung uleh brunei govn. so dont try to act like martabat mu tinggi dari kami..

ohh, shit.. sorry for my rudeness, sorry for my words and everthing. tapi, i just cant stand it okay..

Happy birthday, lil sis.

i know this is common. but im sorry pasal nada hadiah. anyway, happy birthday..

aand, ani gambar lama. sama aku bida. hoooo.

Happy 11 Monthsary Baby~

Hoorey..! thanks for spending you time with me yesterday. eventhough tani dinner saja. but i still rasa as if we were celebrating it. :) I love you..

perhaps

Everything on the net are getting more and more complicated. Its annoying and maybe, im going to shut everything down.. no hotmail account. no blog. no everything. 100% free from the net. ehh, ngam ka tu..? sounds like im making ad for something from it..

And i am absolutely fucked up. uh, i lost my all my sijil antah kemana. and then, dock ipod pun ilang.. why is it bila ku beguna banar, ilang tia. like, vanish tarus. macam, i was iski sudah isi borang buruh and everything. tau tau, sijil nada. iskh.. im having another migrain just because of thinking pasal my missing stuffs....

please, bring my life back.. bring everything back..

migraine peut vous tuer..!!

uh, i cant sleep. i had migrain yesterday.. My eyes and head hurt like hell. I felt a great pressure as if my brain and eyeballs are about to burst. Thank goodness i ate a painkiller. The strong one and im not kidding. I cant even hold a spoon after the effect takes place.. and i cant open my eyes. So i spent pretty much the whole day lying on my bed in a half awake half asleep condition..

edited photo

ohh lame bunyinya.. but anyway, aku mau juaa pakai marker merah arah bibir.. :)



originally black and white photo.. so i didnt apply any makeup on my face. if i did, it would be uglier than this. so be thankful that you only get to see my face this ugly..

humph

ohh, its so gloomy this evening since its raining. yet, its a perfect time to sleep.. hoho, mengantuk ku ulehnya. i wanted to sleep. but i gotta get ready for training later.. woah, malas datang ehh. ani baru MALAS namanya. inda mau grading and so on.. seriously, i almost fed up masa kana complain tu. cant you see that im sweating myself trying to be better?? and you stated that im NOT trying?? if i really am not trying, i wouldnt come every week. i wouldnt get frustrated for every false moves i made. do you really have to bring me down when you expect me to be better just like those so called A plus kids? you cant change me.. you cant.. you really cant.. lets just put a fullstop here, okay? its sickening enough to be around people like you. tuuuut tuuuut tuuuuuuttttxxggghhhzzz zZz zZz krooh krooh krooh...

The Type Of Friends I Would Never Betray

Frankly speaking, I'm sincere when it comes to friendship. I'm not the friendly annoying person who labels everybody as my best buddies. No no, that is so not me. I may get along with one person, but we never know when a person would betray us.

Thank goodness my best buddies are consist of crack heads, no bimbo wannabe, no sluts and whores aaaand they are who they are. I know that each person has an alter ego. And I may not know what their alter ego look like. But then, I'm just glad we get along for almost 5 years. yakaa? But anyway, more than a year is fine, right? Better than backstabbers I've known almost for 15 years..

Guys, I hope that this thing we have wont be another not-so-important friendship since each and everyone of us are going on different roads as we are pursuing our own dreams..

NO TITLE..

First,

Im having my training session tadi and it didnt turn out very well. Im offending by something that someone had said to me. Infront of my face in an open space where i bet every single person heard of it. uh, you're full of shit..! You made me look pathetic. And everybody seemed to give me a 'sorry' treatment..

Thanks baby for picking me up and being there when im down.. Eventhough I acted as if the training went really well..



And second,

I'm pretty excited about having card buruh.. hoo yeah.. inda ku tahan beparam dirumah saja ni.. i know awal awal ani saja ku iski and nanti im pretty sure that i would wanna have these lonely boring days.. anyway, I need to start to kumpul duit.. I so need a life..

Anyway, dudu. mau tidur dulu..

hoo yeah

How sad can I be?

Seeing other people punya love posts.. ohh rindu kuu. wait, kenapa ku beranti buat love posts?? ohh, awu, pasal atu, lupa ku.. pfft.


Baby, thanks for hangin out with me tadi. liat movie and dinner samasama. I heart you so much, sayang.. Too bad you didnt stay longer lapas antar balik tadii.. But I really had good times with you..

Its funny bila ingat cemana bulih I had a crush on you. weee, it was unexpected ohh? Like, banarbanar unexpected. Gosh.. But anyway, I love you wholeheartedly.. :)








BOWH, ADA ORANG JEALOUS NIIIIIIIII~ KAN?

aaaa chooo..!

Watched Clash Of The Titans tadi..! siiuk.. But lately, im surrounded by Greek mythology.. I mean, God Of War.. Percy Jackson And The Lightning Thief.. This one andd satu lagi inda ku ingat.. Ohh man..

By the way, ai en es o em en ai a...! seriously.. I've been awake for more than 24 hours. and i think kan sebulan kali sudah aku aher saja tiduuurr.. hoho. frustrating..

And and.. the population of people who hate me, betambah laaagi.. hahh..! anu, anak ani cakap belakang belakang.. He's a friend of friend of someone I've known for my whole life.. Amazingly, this kid described me in one word.. 'sekalur'..

Well I got something for ya dickface..! being sekalur isn't bad. But being a fucking judgmental is.. Kira pasal rambut ku 'perang' and kuku ku warna brown, sekalur laa tuu? aah, immature.. alum sunat kali niii????

Rasaku, kau yang pakai baju tabal time ke komplex atu yang sekalur. inda jua ada aircond kali ehh arah complex tu. *calm down moy* uh, banar banar waa. sasak ku orang palui macam kau. pindik akal. in your eyes, maybe i look pretty gauk. but you dont know me..

You think you're in a position to judge me, kiddo?! Read this carefully, I've met you and I've known you before kau kenal aku. And you dont even know my name.. duhh, how stupid can you be, arsehole?

I've seen you around, hangin out with your so-called samseng friend. tantang tantang orang. Kira aku takut laa tuu? okay, UUUUUUUUUUUUUUU, im scared..! if thats what you want me to say.

Ehh, shit kau ani ehh. Inda perindungan mu mengajar kali suruh jaga mulut bisai bisai. ani, cam baie waaaa kau aa. *dont ask me ada ka nada perindungan ku megajar supaya jangan cussing.. actually ada, but then, i have my own limit waaa*

Ehh awu. I know the next part will sound um, sekalur.. but, ku dangar, family mu meliara jin?! HAHA..! I was like, 'ohh, pasal nya meliara jin atu tah ya berani judge orang. if orang marah, sihir saja. sanang, abis cerita' TAPI, inda mengasi tuu lai jin mu arah ku... I DARE YOU, SHITFACE..!

anak damit macam kau ani tah mudah gets on my nerves.. *in some cases, orang basar pun adaaaa*

aaaaaaaa, sabar moy.. fuuh.. take a deep breath............................. and sambung...!

Cemani lai, ngalih sudah ku waa melayan orang babal macam kau ani. inda abis abis kan sakit ati arah aku. Tapii, if inda puas ati, i really really recommend you to confront me. Be a REAL man and say it in front of my face. Ani belakang belakang.. tapi label diri sendiri as the coolest person arah smso.. Orang cool nada membali pop ice.. and nada pakai seluar tingkai time form 1. BOO, MALUUUU..!

AGAIN, BERAPA KALI LAGI KU KAN MEMBAGI TAU.. NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO, I WILL ALWAYS WIN..!

So, it would be much much much much much much much much much much better if you just leave me and my sekalurness alone, okay? need i say more?????????

Foto

Some photos taken lapas swimming..

Happy 10 Monthsary. baby..

I LOVE YOU.. :)

tweet tweet

Ohh lala..

I enjoyed yesterday even though my feet were like hell..! Alice in wonderland, COOOOL movie. i wish the movie tu panjang lagi, since it was like, banyak lagi kan diexplore. Johnny Depp rocks..! And then, swimming arah centre point.. woo hoo..! siiiiukk. Lapastu beulah arah JP. Jp makin boring. Tiket makin mahal tapi inda worth apa yang ada sana. VAN kan ke go karts lagi tebiat like hell. So we ended up with main merry go round. haha, retarded ehh kemarin atu. Waste 2 rides. Kan bagi orang, si Qirah maluuuu. haha. And and, aku, qirah, faiz, mushi mus and nana ambil foto arah arcade. Sakai ku since aku baru kali kedua masuk sana. And and aku sama Qirah makan taluuur herba. Yumm yumm. Lapastu BUTUL QIRAH CACAT.. HAHA. ohh, the whole day aku sama nana ketawa pasal atu. you're a real joker qir ehh. :)


Thanks guys pasal bawa aku chill kemarin..

Apis, if kau masukkan arah fb, gambar tani kemarin, tag arah kaka saya yerrr? thanks.. :)

honk honk.

Last saturday..

Dinner at charcoal & grill with my baby and my cousins. Jerudong Park, watched circus. It was kinda okay. But inda worth the ticket yang dibali. boo hoo. And then planning to watch movie. But i was tired so my baby and I headed home.

Anyway, edited a photo taken by my lil sis. For kismis album.. :)

When Emotional isn't Emotional enough

I've been listening to paramore-the only exception for billions of time today. The song stuck on my head. I kept humming the song but fail to sing it while playing guitar.

Anyway, the song reminds me of something. I keep remembering about how I met my boyfriend. Not that it's connected to the song.

It triggers me. Makes me feel like crying.

The moment I decided to give up trying to have you at the first place..

You went back, showing me that I still have a chance.

I went through a lot just because of you.

But then, they're moments I won't regret.

Goodnight baby, I Love you..

For some reason

I just want to make myself extremely tired.

I feel lonely when you aren't here.

Your scent make me realize how much I want you to always be near me.

Paramore-the only exception stucks on my mind.

We're totally opposite, but we're made for each other.

I'm suffering of insomnia.

I feel safe with you.

You're the only thing that makes me forget things I hate.

I cry when I can't sleep.

I sneeze when I look at the sun.

I love you more and more as time passes by.

my day

Ho yeah..!

Went jogging and hiking at Sungai Basong last friday with mom and my lil sister. It was kinda fun since I wasn't alone. But, too bad we didn't go that far. Mom was tired and recently, my eyes hurt and I often get headache. After that, breakfast at Gerai Serambangun.

Went home, napping for about half an hour and then went to Lumut, met cousin. Went home, aaaand, to Tutong Sport Complex. Training was tiring. My left arm and leg isn't functioning very well. So I got too many complain from senpai. hoho.

After a long period of stressful training, my baby picked me up. Thanks baby.. :)

He went home around 11 plus. Text messaging with him and fell asleep.

Girl's Generation

Recently, I've seen too many things about Jesicca from SNSD. I'm freaking annoyed by her. And do you know that she's the most hated person from that group? Well, she is..! The anti snsd group stated that she is a whore. hoho. I visited the website. And I don't even know why. I mean, I'm seriously not a fan of snsd.. SERIOUSLY..!

*awkward silence*


Well, gotta go i guess, bye..!

This is why you're my boyfriend :)

BAYBEH,

Rule my HEART.
Extraordinary.
Do everything to make me happy.

Unbelievably awesome boyfriend.

And such a best mate I can find.
Now that you're mine,
Don't ever leave me.
Even for a second..
Eins <333

I wonder if I'm an EGOMANIAC.

Boyfriend, I miss you soo much.. I know yang I rarely bagitau the fact that I miss you and I seem to wanting you to tell me first.

I just don't wanna look like I'm too easy.






F*ck this ego..!

Ohh man..!

Yesterday I went to Tutong Hospital accompanying my sister. Everything went well with the surroundings. The nurse that worked night-shift (probably) asked if we were visiting someone or seeing the doctor. and then bla bla bla. Just skip that part. That's not what I want to tell you.

So, infront of us at the scanner line thingy was this so-called emo girl. Or should I call a fake depressed sicko? Anyway, since I rarely get out of my house, I rarely meet people like that. Aaaah, skip that again. While waiting for my sister, that girl from earlier, went inside, sitting near me. And looking at me with that UNBELIEVABLY UGLY FACE. She is a planet. (no offence but I only apply this term to someone I dislike) With that black eye shadow, BIDA..!

What the hell eh? I mean, I'm not a fan nor anti emo. For me, there's NO such thing as EMO. Teens tend to follow the trend. It's just sooo fake. And if you really are depressed and would like to be called EMO, you don't need to actually show your emoness by not smiling as if mulut mu kana badung dari damit or jaling jaling macam aku ani luan lawa and kau sakit ati meliat aku. duhh, that is so immature.

I know all this time I sounded like I'm desperate for fame so people think I'm cool or something. It wasn't like that guys. I just tend to hate people easily. I know I'm not perfect and I've stated that already in my previous post about the spammer. Ohh my, I think I know what they've felt when they spammed my blog. Again, sorry for bringing this back, I can't get over things.

At the same time, I'm thankful that you guys are willing to read my nonsense posts. It's up to you to decide what kind of human being am I. If you're sick of reading my hate posts, don't bother to not read it. If you're trying to confront me for having such 'busuk hati' since I often highlight how ugly someone can be, I advice, DON'T even try to blame me for being what I am. You're not so perfect. And those people deserved to be hated by me. I hate them because they seemed to hate me. And sometimes because........ um, well... they um seemed to hate me? *again*

Gosh, I have such a great humor. I bet if I made a video about this post, you'll hate me. Seriously, I talk bulls*hits. Uh, I feel like typing and end up with over ceritakan pasal bini bini atu.

Happy 9th Monthsary Baby

Need to show off a bit.

I Love You Baby.. I'm so so so glad we've come this far.

And I have no idea what else to say. I had good times with you yesterday, thanks for spending your times with me.. :)

You're in no place to look at me like that coz you have NO BOOBS..!

You PUNDAN, I hate your face. You look like a beaten ass burning by the grill smells like BELACAN BURUK..! Get a mirror, look at your boobs.. You have NONE, mannnn. Please, get a life. grow your mustache, dont trim that eyebrows. and stop hiding your pin-ass. It's right there dude. I can see its bulging. duhh..!

with Love,
nuramira

LABU AIR

Simple editing. Lame, I know.

Random photo

I met this kid at a saloon near ayamku. Bukan agogo. Yang sebalah mobility tuu. And ani lapasnya begunting rambut. I thought anak ani bini bini. rupanya laki laki. And he's a photo maniac. haha. Ada another photo of him posing arah kerusi. Eeeeeeeee..! Gigitan baa ulehnya.

SELAMAT HARI KEBANGSAAN..!

Another year living peacefully. hoo-yeah..!

My Dull Boring Blog

I noticed that my blog is kinda dull with the non-colored texts. So, from now on, I will try my best *woseh* to put some rainbows and skittles on my future posts.. BOO-YAA..!

18.02.2010

Happy Birthday To You, Baby.. :)

I had good times with you. Celebrating your birthday eventhough it was only both of us. But I really really enjoyed it. Im glad that you decided to accept my offer, to spend your day with me.

The feelings I had.. They were the feelings I felt when I know that you're finally mine. Im happy that we've come this far, baby..

I miss the old era

Dear siblings and cousins,


I miss BECA BAPA.. :'(

Tani lari lari pakai singlet and selipar basar.

Jalan kaki kekadai dapan bali kerupuk and stuffs.

Main pintar pintas or pintas pintar, whatsoever, pakai 'gelunsur'.

Main mama mama and perasan belayar luar negeri.

Abuk bagas menunu, imagine atu snow.

Lari lari arah pantai kumpul shells.

Ikut bapa ke Tasek Merimbun, then begambar arah buaya basar.

Picnic arah Tasek Merimbun sama bapa.

Cuci kereta bapa then bapa bagi upah.

Membual mimpi.

I miss BAPA.. :'(

my eins

Ohh, it feels like when I first saw you.. :)

When I first thought that it is impossible to have you. I complained a lot about me, having no guts at all to confess and everything. But at last, I managed to tell you that I like you sooo much. You're different from all of them. I know people say that a lot when they're in love. But, it's the reality, baby. You're not another fake psycho that tries to fool me. You make me happy. I'm grateful that I met you. I'm grateful that I have a super awesome boyfriend like you.

I Love You, Baby.. :')

ohh man..!

Gawd..! wait, that is soo lame..

Anyway, hi guys.. I'm just updating my blog and my KISMIS album. And and, thanks for supporting me, guys. I know that this is just a small idea. But then, i really hope that one day I will be able to um, at least make more that 10 people know about this small idea..

Tee-hee..!

And, there it is, the new one that I've edited.. It has these small details. I dont know if it's clear.. But I did try my best.. And i sound so desperate, uh..! Anyway, again, I hope you like it.. :)

Life with no life

Do you know the feeling when we regretted everything? the feeling when we feel like saying something, but we couldn't? I feel that way everytime I'm alone. probably because I have nothing to do.. I mean, come on.. I wake up, thinking what will happen, thinking what I should do for the rest of the boring day. As if I'm not bored enough. I wonder if this boredom will end sooner.. Even now, I feel like TRASHING around. I don't even have moods to complete my CV. Aaaaah, this is frustrating.

dudu du dudu du du

Hey guys. sorry for the 0 updates, again.. its been a dull week for me. i was busy memanyap bilik.. but thanks to my boyfriend, its finally over. aaand, during the cleaning, cockroaches attacked us. eeewww... and i found my old memorable stuffs.. and thanks to him again, he threw some of it away. my mom starts calling me hoarders. hoho. long story short, bilik ku bersih suuudah. and its officially made into a new clean room. eventhough ada stains and stuff. but its clean. and and, soon, bilik tu, will jadi my uncle's room. and thats the one and only reason why i clean it. we did it for 3 days in a row. woaaah, mun diingatkan, i actually had good times fooling around, reading old papers and stuff while my boyfriend is busy cleaning and vacuuming it.. ohh, sorry for all the troubles i caused, baby.. next time help me clean the whole house lagii aa, okay? :) sorry nada photos. inda ku tepikir kan mengambar..

im stuffing fats and carbs in to my body.

Im getting fatter. 'makan tidur, makan tidur' 47kg, not a happy number for me. bukan pulang inda besyukur. its just that, im filled with 47kg of bad foods. mun uleh healthy foods, i'd probably be writing post yang titlenya 'im gonna live longer' (haters, i know what you think, stop cursing me)

Actually i dont know what to write. i dont want you to think that i left this blog. so, even if i make nonsense posts, at least you know that im still alive and still capable of moving my fingers to type this lame post.

Okay. dudu, bye bye.

To: Zee Shaun, the emo kid.

hey retard, i miss you. we havent contact each other for like, AGES..! i wonder how's your life right now.. still living with a shattered heart? ohh, you're the best person on earth i can find when i feel like killing myself. and know, i cant.. well, i changed my phone last time due to laggingness of my previous phone. aaand, i thought i saved you phone number on my sim card. so that explains why i havent contacted you yet. buuut, do contact me after you read this... dudu, bye bye retard..!

what actually happens to my love life? haters, get ready to partay coz you might win today.

ohh wait, what?! naah, you'd probably think that im sick of posting love posts. and that is not going to happen. after all, some people just hate it when im happy.. which makes me wanna hurt them more and more till they cant deal with it. ohh, yeah..! sounds fun ehh?

Well, i know the issue should be over by now. buuut, the spammer wasn't the only one who has issues. Trust me. so, this is basically just to shoo away people who are sick of me. guess what? im sicker than you are when i see you. bad compliments, LAYAN~ thinking about cursing me right now? I'll curse you back. :)

Look, the point is, whatever you're trying do, I WILL ALWAYS WIN.. :D

new and boring thing.

Olaa guys. as you can see, below is the new cover for my own um, personal photo collection. i named it KISMIS for its randomness. actually it was my cousin's idea. -kismis means random- its not a foreign language.. but, we created it. i know kismis means raisin and its lame. we have a reason why kismis is random. aaanyway, enough talking about it..



For your information, the photo, candid..! I took it and the hand, my cousin's..

To spammers and haters, jealous much coz i have a retard mind and not-so-cool creativity? feel free to judge my lameness and boringness and whatever there is about me that you hate the most. but please, use your own name. and honestly, im full of shit and i am boring and lame aaaand i desperately need a job...!

dududuuuu...

Okay, i take it back.. think twice before you judge me, okay? you aint gonna like it when im being thankful for your COMPLIMENTS. :)

oh, man..!

halu guys. guess what?! i have a bone fragment on my pinky finger of my left arm. aah, no wonder it hurts so much. when i first went to the clinic for a checkup, the doctor said that it was nothing. like, maybe i've had a trauma or something and it will be alright. but i told her that my finger hurts for more than 2 months. she ignored me. but, the next day, it was another doctor. she ask me if i wanna do an x-ray. and i said yes. so, bla bla bla, the result, FRAGMENTS..! ohh ohh, masa first checkup tu, i was ask to ambil blood test. and i cried masa liat syringe aa. oh man..! it felt like my heart nearly bursts. i know atu sekadar.. but im phobia arah jarum. uh, it was embarrassing.

anyway, sorry for the ZERO updates. :) i wasn't busy. just, malas.